Is'nt It So ?

Wow! The only word I could manage to say right now. Being a bit crazy. Yes I am.

I used to think myself falling into pieces untill I knew the blah-blah about myself. Right now the moment should have been very grim but alas ! it is not. Why not ? Never mind.

But I enjoyed the whole scene. Being a faithfull aprentice of the life; I concocted it all.

One may want to know what I am talking about. That's irrelevant. What I am right now is of value ( obviously, to me only ).

It's a beautiful life.

Is'nt it so ?

Errabor Massacre : Ugly Face Of Salwa Judum

Yesterday will always be remembered as a black day in the history ofthis infant state. Last night the salwa judum relief camp was attackedby hundreds of armed naxalites killing almost 40 campers. Thedisturbing part is this that naxalites were literally dancing on theblood of those innocent tribals and there was'nt any security aroundto stop them.For me, Chief Minister Dr. Raman Singh is equally responsible for thismassacre. Without arranging any solid security for the campers thisattack was made easier and expected. The whole security of them is theresponsibility of the state govt and being the head of the govt DrSingh should immediately resign on the moral grounds.Salwa Judum which is translated as the path to peace has fallen apartwith this ruthless act. There is no relief in the relief camps itself.Errabore massacre has exposed the flaws in so called self-initiatedmovement of Salwa Judum.Solid measure has to be taken now to stop all this. If necessary,salwa judum should also be called off as this movement is now runningat the expense of innocent lives.

AT MY COST.....

Life is like a school. I heard it many times but recently started living it.
Last evening also came like a lesson being taught to me. A lesson that was much awaited.
Last evening I learned that it is unfair always to be one of a caring nature. Unfair not with others but unfair with ourselves.
For me there is no line between a truth and a lie. In the words of G. E. Moore who is going to judge what is a truth and what is a lie. But in my own words whatever necessary to hear is a truth and what not is a lie. It's quite rational but for me it is true.
For me, any statement coming out of love is a truth and any statement coming out of hideousness is a lie.
If I put it in the words of Herbert Agar," The truth that makes men free is for the most part the truth which men prefer not to hear".
I would simply say that which is not prefered to be heard is a lie.
Or in the words of Oscar Wilde," Truth is rarely pure & never simple"
I always lived what I thought about truth and a lie.
But last evening taught me that it's not always good to live what you think. Simple but difficult to digest .
But this teaching has showed me a new way.
A way, to live on my own. Without concerning others but only to concern about myself.
And every time I witnessed such a concern I simultaneously saw a conversion of my own. Obviously in a good sense.
I am reminded Nietzsche once wrote," when one has much to put into them, a day has hundred of pockets".
Mr Nietzsche I have a lot to put so my day do have millions of pockets.
Every day is like a new phenomenon. That is waiting to teach me something and as an obedient and some what unethical student I am always prepared to learn.
Again I am reminded of my dear old and crazy Friedrich Nietzsche. He wrote," Out of life's school of war: what does not destroys me makes me stronger."
I would go a step further. What destroys me also, makes me stronger.

THE FULL MOON....

Tonight is a different night. Tonight it's a full moon night. I saw the moon for a long time. But what I saw filled with an awkward feeling. I saw clouds started covering the moon. After a while it became impossible to see the moon. But I could still see the moonlight.
Is'nt our life the same. Whenever the moon within us is full , the clouds tend to cover it. Last night I was having an interesting conversation with one of my dear ones. For that person ecstasy and blissfulness are mere psychology of mind. I asked that person it would be good if u call sorrows, frustration and regression also psychology. It would be a fair game then.
But for most us sorrow is reality and happiness is a psychology. One may get surprised to know this but it's true.
We live in such a world where if a man who is crossing the road with a smile on face without any reason will be considered crazy by most of the passer bys but on the other hand if the same man is crying hard with loads of tears in his eyes; everyone will think that that guy is in sorrow and everyone will start showing their sympathy.
What a mad world this is, where smile is considered craziness and tears are shown sympathy and respect. Try it if you don't believe.
But I know one day the moon within us will come out of the cloud.
In the mean while the moon over my head has also come out of the clouds. And it's looking beautiful.
Is it good sign ? Let's see.

A THOUGHT ON ANNIVERSARY...

Anniversaries. We celebrate our anniversaries. Birth anniversaries, marriage anniversaries and many of them. We make it an event of happiness. Happiness for one more year completed.
But should we really be happy?
Should'nt we be sorrowful that one more year of our life is passed and we did'nt achieved anything?
This may seem to be a pessimistic idea but this is true.
Looking back into our past one year may fill us with vainty but is'nt this vanity just a kind of consolation.
I don't know of other but I can only speak of myself.
One more year of my life has passed and still I can feel the same emptiness.
Every passing of year comes into the form of anniversary. This anniversy should remind us that our life is too short. We are one more step closer to our death now. So, the time is less. This less time can be made useful. Useful, in the sense that we can be more humane.
Yes, this little time we can devote to fill ourselves with love. To fill ourselves with compassion.
Gurdjieff used to say that it is not necessary that every human being has soul, but every human being has potentiality.
This potentiality can be used and used in good sense.
Every one of us are intelligent but I call those intelligents idiots who use is to make things like nuclear bombs and I call those intelligents wise who use it for the service of soul which eventually results in the service of humanity.
I never find reason for my happiness. Anniversary is a kind of reason for those who find themselves falling short when the question of happiness arises. For some eccentric like me, every day is an anniversary.
So, my dear the clock is ticking. It is in our hand what to be. Think and think deeply.

MY REBIRTH.....

It was difficult. very difficult to die. But I had to if I wanted to be born again. Not physically but spiritually. Still the process is not over. But atleast something within me, which I used to despise has died. Still a long way to go.
G. I . Gurdjieff used to quote an old Russian saying that a hunchback can get straight only in his grave. One has to die to change.
And the process of my birth is going on. I sometime feel that this may be life long process. Let's see. And who cares?

CONFESSION OF A CONFUSEFD PERSON

I know a person. That person is confused. confused b'coz he knows everything about life but does not lives. He simply cannot fit what he knows into what he lives. Shocking it may seem but it's true. From Socratese to Nietzsche , he knows everything. Almost used to read 4-5 books in a week. He loves Zen. He adores Jesus. He practised meditation. And above all, he loves Osho. But today that person is confused. He finds nothing practical in books. Life for him, is beyond philosophies and beautiful quotes. He still gets depressed when is being ignored although he knows about the Diogenesian art of being ignored. He still gets jealous although he knows it's wrong. He still becomes sorrowful although he knows about the zen teachings. I know why ? B'coz that person is living being. He is alive and the teachings are dead.
I know that person. That person is me.
Once again the spider has started weaving a new web. Once again I am trying to pave my own path.
Once again the light is fading and the lamp in my hand is about to loose it's light as the winds are blowing fiercely.
Once again the dance of the fate has begun.
I remember wittgenstein- that which cannot be said , must be passed over in silence.
The silence is already there.
He also said that that which can be shown cannot be said.
I go a step further. THAT WHICH CAN BE SEEN,CANNOT BE SAID.

I HAVE HEARD.....

Nan-in a Zen master(1868-1912), received a university professor who came to inquire about Zen. Nan-in served tea. He poured his visitor's cup full & then kept on pouring. The professor watched the overflow untill he no longer restrain himself. He said , " It is overfull. No more will go in. "
"Like this cup " Nan-in said," you are full of your own opinions & speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup ? "

THREE GOLDEN SUTRAS OF HAPPINESS

1). Never give any reason to happiness. Happiness should be reasonless. Once we start to search the reason to be happy we make sure the vanishing of happiness when the reason is gone.

2). Never take anything in life seriously. Seriousness makes the life dull. Nothing in this existence is actually serious.

3). Never expect anything. Expectation alone brings reasons and seriousness. Life should be expectationless.